Fear

It happened the other night. It was a rough night. Jill had a couple of big meltdowns before bed and her sleep was restless at best. She was up most of the night in despair which means we were too and then it hit me. Fear. Do I really have what it takes to be the momma of such an extraordinary little life. I was thinking pediatric nutrionists, therapists... Can I really be the best for her? I began to sink into the pit of fear at the overwhelming thought of it all. Then God whispered his word to my heart.. I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength (Philipians 4:13). This job isn't about me and what I can do at all because I cannot do it. BUT Christ can do it through me and he promises that he will. Then Isaiah 26:3 came "You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you because he trusts you." Trust. Trust God who knows what he is doing. Who knows what is ahead on this road and who has equipted me to walk it from the beginning.

Beautiful Day with our girl on Thursday..

She played new games with momma and daddy. She let us hold her in a walking position and tickle her. She was giggling up a storm.

She let us rub her back to soothe her to sleep at nap and bedtime. She didn't have a meltdown before bedtime at all!

She found her belly button.

She recognized the equiptment momma uses to soothe her ear and laid down on her side when she saw me coming with it because she knew I was going to clean her ear.

She discovered Sis's DS and watched in awe.

She continues to captivate us with her little resilient spirit and those eyes.

Momma enjoyed a wonderful time with her big girl too. Darling kiddo and I went to the Terra Cotta Warriors Tomb and a market. We even attended a tea ceremony and bought tea to share with her class when we get home. Em is growing into a fine young woman and I am grateful to God for every minute I have to enjoy being with her.

Wonderful day. Blessed.