I' m Leaving You Today

Dear Jillian,
Your clothes are picked out, your little shoes are chosen, and your ready.  My heart has wrenched over this decision for the sixteen months since you have been mine and today will be the first day that I am leaving you at preschool for half an hour.  Keeping you home with me is such a joy and the memories that we are making are treasures in my heart, but today I will leave you for thirty minutes so that you can be part of a speech group lesson with your peers apart from your momma.  I am praying for you.  I am praying that you know that momma is here for you always in this life.  I am praying that you will feel peace and that you will enjoy being with the other children, enjoy sitting on the rug reading stories, and that your heart will sing with joy while you learn.  I am sure that keeping you home for school and therapy the rest of the week is the best thing to do, but I am excited that you will have this little piece added to your life too.  I love you with everything in me my darling girl.  Before having you home I couldn't have ever begun to understand how hard all of this would be, but I would do it again and again if it meant I could call you my daughter.  So, today I begin to release you slowly to the world.  I know that it has been a harsh place for you in the two short years before God brought us together, but I pray that you feel a bit safer now and with time you will be able to tackle all that is set before you.  I know God has big plans for your little life and I wait anticipating all that He will accomplish through you.
I love you!
Momma