Hard Place

Jill is doing so well. So well that I sometimes forget the hard places that she has been and the first two years of her life that is a part of who she is..the part before a momma and daddy came to claim her as their own. Then it creeps back in stealing her joy and her security. It happened last night. She laid and cried for almost two hours before finally falling asleep. She asked me to rock her twice as the tears just kept coming. It was as if she desperately wanted me to be able to help her rock out of whatever was hurting in her heart. She couldn't make it out though. The longer she cried, the deeper she fell into her memories. By the end of the two hours the poor baby was crying with some deep intensity breaking this momma's heart. I was on my knees in prayer beside her begging God to take her pain away and dreaming of a night that these times are no more. When she finally fell asleep, her rest was fitful at best. She woke sobbing and rocking herself at 4:00 AM. It has been weeks since she has rocked herself and cried this way. When will this pain be gone? Will she ever be able to heal from all that she has endured in her little life? Turning it over to God who is the ultimate healer. Hoping with each episode that the part of her heart that is opened up and hurting will be repaired by Him who made her and has walked alongside her from the beginning.