My sweet girl got a ten dollar bill from her great grandma for her birthday and so today we decided to use it to visit the new museum in the city near our own. I had been before with a group of kids that I get to hang out with on Thursday so I was familiar with what to expect for our treasure and I thought she might enjoy it.
Heading out at about 9:30 with lunches packed, we set off for our destination.
There is a water play area.
Water is my girl's number one LOVE!
This was the first place she headed and by far we spent the most time here.
She explored every nook and cranny of the water tables.
She willingly put on the smock, touched all the pipes, played near the balls, pushed the boats..
I could go on and on and on because she really liked this area.
Kids came and went around her, but she didn't let it bother her.
There was even a very loud hand dryer that stopped her dead
in her tracks the first time it came on, but did little to effect her after that.
I convinced her to move over to the block area.
There was a class there playing too.
They were preschool age and there were about fifteen of them.
They were loud, busy, and surrounded her, but she wasn't at all deterred.
She built and stacked.
She played and explored despite all the chaos around her.
It was very hard to get her attention though.
Her senses were heightened as she was trying to keep up with all the commotion around her.
When the class was leaving and began picking up around her, she followed their lead and started putting the blocks away too. She stood patiently in line with her giant block in hand waiting to get to the cabinet.
She sat and played at the dinosaur table a bit.
She even hung out in the small gross motor area they have.
Balls were present and she was aware they were there, but managed to coexist nicely.
(We have come a long way baby!!)
She enjoyed the gear wall too.
She made me sing the round and round song while she worked those gears good.
She put several small ones together, but the big ones were her favorite.
We ended our day building race cars and running them down a ramp.
She loved the ramp.
Those cars fly!
There was even a giant sandbox in this room which you were not allowed to get in.
Jillian didn't think that was so much fun because she kept signing "in momma"!
What is a sandbox if you can't get in anyway?
Walking in to the museum this morning, I was thinking about how she was doing just that.
She used to ask to be carried any time we went somewhere new.
She interacted with every display that was at her developmental level.
She wasn't completely comfortable with the crowd.
She didn't smile too much and was really quiet, but she made it through.
(and so did momma)
I have to admit that I was wrestling with grief on the way home.
As the momma of a child with special needs, there are many times that I wrestle with the reality that she just can't always enjoy things the way "typical" kiddos can. I mourn her inability to be carefree at times. I miss the chance to see her laughing and playing, talking and interacting as freely as other kids her age.
It is in these times that God whispers tenderly to my heart and reminds me that He made her just the way she is and that His plan for her does not always match the dream that I may have. He reminds me that I can mourn, but what I need to do most is lay my grief at the foot of the cross so that I can keep meeting this sweet treasure right where she is at-walking patiently beside her so that one day she can become all that God intends for her to be. I praise Him today that He loves us so much and that He has given me the chance to parent this very special creation of His making who is fearfully and wonderfully made by Him..just the way she is. I pray that I can continue to lean on Him as I work to be the best I can be for her through Him.