Deuteronomy 4:35

You have been shown these things that you might know the Lord is God besides him there is no other.

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Then and Now..

As I think of bringing home our Anna Mei, I have so many emotions.
I can't wait to have another sweet baby girl to call daughter.
I am over the moon excited to have another to lead in the ways of our Lord.
I look forward to so many things.
there is also a great deal of fear and many questions and what ifs.
What if I can't care for two treasures with special needs?
What if I can't love them both as much as they need?
(I could go on and on.)
One thing I know is that this fear does not come from God.

And so..
when fear begins to grip my heart I remember.

I remember my first sweet treasure when she was first placed in my arms.
I remember her at 26 months.
15 pounds.
Unable to walk.
Unable to eat solid food.
Unwilling to be held, cuddled, or loved.
I remember her low assessment scores.
Speech skills at 2 months.
Cognitive skills at 6 months.

That was then..

And this, my friends, is now...

She is vibrant, full of life.
She is signing up a storm, eating and chewing, and loves all attention to be on her at all times.
She loves, cuddles, and enjoys so many things.
She is a gifted climber, can run so fast, and takes apart everything.
She is a precious, valuable gift!
I wouldn't change a minute of this crazy, hard journey to our first adopted treasure.
Jillian is a miracle and she has come so far.
She is not a typical kid, but one who will likely always have challenges as she faces daily life.
I have come to cherish her just as God has made her.
I give thanks that God has allowed me a part of watching her come as far as she has.
I look forward to the future and know that He has numbered every one of our days.

I trust Him.

He is faithful.

He has shown Himself mighty in my life.

He knows our Anna Mei.

He set her perfectly in our family and I trust Him with this adoption.

I will not fear!

I will lean on the one who made me and set this journey before me!
(Now..if I could just be patient with His timing to get to our newest girl home.)

"For I know the plans that I have for you," declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  Jeremiah 29:11


  1. Aww, amazing! What an awesome family you are!! You have a heart of gold! And a precious family!!
    -Beka =)

  2. So excited for Jillian!!! She has come so far! Isn't God so AMAZING? Can't wait for little Anna to join your family!!!

    Love ya

  3. Leslie,

    I remember my own fear when we were so uncertain of Halle's future AND I had just found out about our new baby. Looking back can still make me shake in my boots. But we've made it. Day by day we still hang in. And I know you will too. After all, life only happens moment to moment. All you have to do is keep moving forward and doing your best. God fills in the blanks.