Deuteronomy 4:35

You have been shown these things that you might know the Lord is God besides him there is no other.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Dear Anna Mei

Dear Anna Mei,
It is so easy to forget, when your days look so normal, all that you have been through.  It is in the dark during the night that you remember.  You must be flooded with emotion and memories, sweet girl, as you try to rest because sleep in the last weeks is not easy for you.  Last night, you cried in your sleep for nearly an hour while momma rubbed your back and kissed those sweet chubby cheeks, but nothing consoled you.  The feelings just had to pass and after they did you entered back into a peaceful rest.  How I wish I could take this from you, but I know that God is working in your heart and will use all the circumstances of your life to make you  into the women that He desires for you to be.  Just last night, Daddy and I were marveling at all that you are.  You truly are the most outgoing treasure we have and enjoy very much engaging people everywhere we go.  At the graduation party last night, you sat at a table of strangers and charmed them from the comfort of my lap.  You have an infectious smile and a laugh that makes even the harshest heart soften.  You know what you want and expect to get it.  You grab hold of life and just desire to enjoy every bit of it.  I love your cheeks and the way your eyes disappear when you smile.  I love that you insist on wearing shoes at all times, how you love being in the kitchen with me, how you move your little wrists and flap your arms when you dance, and the way you are constantly shadowing me mimicking everything I do.  I love the way that you say UPPP.. with your arms raised hundreds of times a day because you want me to hold you.  I love the way your roll your "or" sound when you say more.  I love the way you snuggle into my chest when you first wake up and the way you mix all your food together like a chemist doing research for some important experiment each time you have a meal.  I love that I get to be your momma.  This adventure of parenting you is only just beginning and we are learning so much about each other everyday.   I know that you will continue to grow and that one day you may not even remember China except for the things that I will tell you, but for now it is real to you and you are sad.  I know sweet girl.  I know and I will comfort you, hold you, and love you through this while I pray for God's comfort and will as He works to repair your heart and make a new start for you with us.  I love you dear baby.  I am grateful to Him for making you mine.
All my love, 

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